Book Recommendation: Living with What You Love: Decorating with Family Photos, Cherished Heirlooms, and Collectibles by Monica Rich Kosan

I have always been enchanted by homes that, rather than having a "decorator" look, reveal the personalities, tastes, and values of the family members who live there.  The presence of family photos, heirlooms, and collectibles illustrate the author's observation that "a house is not a home unless it displays our most cherished possessions."  Living with What You Love gives us the inspiration, tools, and suggestions to approach our own possessions with the goal of reminding ourselves (and others) of who we are, and how we can display our precious objects with creativity and style.

I have years of accumulating photographs, books, and other precious items behind me; my challenge is to be selective in my choices for display.  We are reminded, though, that "cherished objects are not just things of the past.  Whenever we take a photograph, add a personal touch to something that belongs to us, or select a new piece for a collection, we are in the process of creating heirlooms."

A section of the book shows us the value of mixing the old and the new all around the house, especially in regard to photographs; mixing generations of family members can introduce discussions of the past and present.  Also within the pages of the book, you'll find ideas for displaying large and small photos, as well as using technology for always-changing photo display.  Photographic illustrations include an heirloom silver tray holding small, intimate photos framed in silver and a large tv screen devoted to rotating family photographs.

Since my home is filled with books, I was particularly interested in the ideas for mixing them with photos and other items. 

I was also reminded that other precious items can be framed, including certificates, letters, and diplomas and placed on the wall with treasured photographs.  For a start, I'm going to copy the back of my and my husband's birth certificates, showing our baby footprints, for a photo area in our guest bedroom.

Other suggestions included leaving albums and loose photos out in  open boxes or baskets for friends and family to thumb through.

A chapter heading called "Intimate Landcapes"  refers to little areas that remind us of what is important to us.  Tabletops, shelves, mantels, buffets, wherever there is a flat surface can be used to put together family vignettes, which can include memories to hold in your hand, such as individual or collections of rocks, jewelry, or other mementos.

Devoted space can be places individual members of the household use for their own purposes, including personal offices or studios or spots as small as a closet or even an open drawer -- any place that can be used to reveal and enjoy the individual's personal choices of photos and memorabilia.

I would highly recommend this book for anyone interested in decorating the home with a more personal touch and especially for the beautiful photographs, which can serve as a springboard to more ideas for creativity and personal pleasure in our surroundings.

You can purchase Living with What You Love from Amazon or borrow it from your public library, as I did.

Christmas Joys #14 - Blended Families, "The Lion Sleeps Tonight," and Christmas Lights

Christmas memories often come in the form of traditions such as "Our family always attended Christmas services on Christmas Eve" or "My mother and I baked and iced cookies the week before" which are usually based and recounted in a childhood setting.

We realize, of course, that not all Christmas memories are good ones, and (paraphrasing what I recently read in the wonderful novel The Widower's Tale by Julia Glass) at every family event, at least one or two dramas are going on in the background and family alliances form and reform like clouds in the sky.

Those of us who have "blended" families know how difficult it can be to forge new holiday traditions. Our family, in the 1980's, wasn't exactly the Brady Bunch  Our six children included four teenagers/young adults and two little girls who had seen their parents separate and divorce.  We were dealing with disappointments, broken dreams, and failed expectations and were struggling to create a semblance of harmony and hope during the holiday season.  But we were "feeling our way", because we didn't have any standard or set of instructions, except our own memories of our childhood family or a recently broken one, neither of which still existed.

What helped break the ice for us was a song, but it wasn't a Christmas Carol or even a popular holiday "sing-along" tune.  It was "The Lion Sleeps Tonight."

We decided to load all of the kids into the oversized gas-guzzling van we owned and drive to Sky Island in Oklahoma City to see the Christmas lights.  Sky Island was a neighborhood that attracted visitors from all over Central Oklahoma to their beautifully decorated light displays.  It was a "destination" for families and I remember that it was certainly something to see, but as they say," the trip was more important than the destination".

We sang on the way.  We sang with the radio.  We sang without the radio.  For some reason, we sang "The Lion Sleeps Tonight."  As you may remember, there are high voices and there are low voices; there is chanting and howling and yodelling in the popular recording, and although our rendition wasn't technically perfect, it provided an outlet for six children (and two adults) during the holiday drive, a time for silliness and fun.  And for that few moments, for the first time, we were a family.

We were (and  25 years later, continue to be) a family.  We're not perfect (but what family is?) and our Christmas memories are a mix of good and not-so-good, serious and funny, picture-perfect and downright embarrassing, attentive and attention-seeking, giving and "give-me" moments, that make Christmas (and our lives) human and not Hollywood (or Hallmark) manufactured.   And for that I'm grateful.

I'm thankful, too, for my special Christmas memory of the Christmas lights and "The Lion Sleeps Tonight".  My special wish for all "blended families" during this holiday season -- enjoy each other and love each other and, if you have a drama, a disagreement, or just a lapse in the conversation, try singing a few bars of "In the jungle, the mighty jungle.. . "

Annie

Christmas Joys #13 - Retro Santa and Mrs. Claus

Santa and Mrs. Claus have a place of honor on top of the shelves in my office.  They belonged to Tom's Aunt Betty, who was like his second mom.  We put them next to the Mary Engelbreit mailbox so that they can keep up with all the Christmas letters Santa will receive.

I hope that you will continue to join me throughout the month of December as I post about some special decorations, traditions, collections and memories that bring the joy of the season to our house. Perhaps you will want to respond with your own story or comment about what brings happiness to your heart at Christmas. I would love to hear from you and look forward to sharing a bit of Christmas! Annie

Christmas Joys #11 - Remembering Mr. Bingle




 During my early years in school, I looked forward to watching my favorite television program, The Howdy Doody Show, every afternoon when I got home.  I loved the members of the cast -- Buffalo Bob, Clarabelle, Chief Thunderthud, Mr. Bluster, Dilly Dally, Flub-a-Dub, Princess Summerfall Winterspring, and of course, Howdy Doody. 

Another program appeared during the month of December and was broadcast by a Memphis television station (which reached my hometown of Kennett, Missouri) and sponsored by Lowenstein's Department Store.  Although the Mr. Bingle show only lasted five minutes, I would never miss it, and his high-pitched voice was as familiar to me as the deep "ho, ho, ho" of Santa Claus.  Mr. Bingle's role in the program was to assist Santa, usually by getting him out of a jam (such as missing toys).

Mr. Bingle was actually a product of the New Orleans department store, Maison Blanche, first conceived there in 1948.  Most recently, he has been associated with Dillards Department Stores, although I have never seen him in any of our local stores.

Many children have received and adults have collected Mr. Bingle dolls and other memorabilia over the years, but for me, he remains a specific childhood memory, a little voice and "snowy" picture on a black and white television set, sharing Christmas magic with children throughout Memphis and the mid-south.

You can learn more about Mr. Bingle, his story, and his many fans and their memories by visiting the Mr. Bingle Fans website.

I hope that you will continue to join me throughout the month of December as I post about some special decorations, traditions, collections and memories that bring the joy of the season to our house. Perhaps you will want to respond with your own story or comment about what brings happiness to your heart at Christmas. I would love to hear from you and look forward to sharing a bit of Christmas! Annie

Photograph of Mr. Bingle was used with permission from Kerry Crawford, who writes the  I Love Memphis blog.

Christmas Joys #5 - Some More Special Tree Ornaments

As you can tell, our Christmas tree has quite a "symphony" of decorations, but none are more important to me than those that were made by hand by my children.  The paper and beaded candy canes and the felt horse were added to our ornament collection about twenty-five years ago and share the stage with more "elegant" ornaments such as the dated 1981 Dove of Peace.  The little knitted jingle bell is one of several and is also beginning to show some age.
When we downsized our home, we also had to reduce the size of our tree, which makes it necessary to snuggle the ornaments more closely.

I hope that you will join me throughout the month of December as I post about some special decorations, traditions, collections and memories that bring the joy of the season to our house. Perhaps you will want to respond with your own story or comment about what brings happiness to your heart at Christmas. I would love to hear from you and look forward to sharing a bit of Christmas! Annie

Christmas Joys #4 - A Holiday Memory from the Court Square

This 1950's photograph is from a Christmas party at James Kahn's Department Store in Kennett, Missouri.  Two of the ladies pictured here have been very precious to me during my life; on the far left is my Aunt Ann, who was like my grandmother, and in the middle (third from the right) is my stepmother, Jo Ann, who married my dad in 1985.

That both of them were employed by James Kahn's has special significance to me at Christmas, because it takes me back to my childhood when I bought gifts for friends and family.  That always meant a trip to the town square, where I did most of my shopping at Kahn's and Blakemore Drug Store, just a few steps away.  My Aunt Ann always took a few minutes to help and advise me on my purchases, and I would usually stop by the office to say hello to Jo Ann.  Later, when I was a teenager, I got a job at Kahn's wrapping gifts during the school Christmas break.  (I was one of dozens of girls, including Sheryl Crow, who were lucky enough to get a Christmas job at Kahns through the years.)

Both Ann and Jo Ann are gone now (Jo Ann left us November 7), but they will always be in my heart and in my Christmas memories.

James Kahn's closed its doors several years ago, but the building is enjoying a new life (or should I say, a renewed one).  The building first opened as an opera house, and is again "The Opera House", a venue for special events in town.  I understand that a small part of the department store was maintained when the remodeling was done. 

Gift-wrapper Sheryl Crow returned to Kennett to give a special benefit concert at the Opera House to an audience of 250 the day after Thanksgiving.  And tomorrow, December 5, the Opera House will open its doors from 1:00 until 3:00 to welcome in the holiday season and continue the tradition of Christmas on the court quare.

I know that Ann and Jo Ann would love that!

I hope that you will join me throughout the month of December as I post about some special decorations, traditions, collections and memories that bring the joy of the season to our house. Perhaps you will want to respond with your own story or comment about what brings happiness to your heart at Christmas. I would love to hear from you and look forward to sharing a bit of Christmas! Annie

Music Contributes to the Fabric of our Lives

You may have seen the television commercial about cotton -- the touch, the feel, the fabric of our lives.  I would like to add that, for me at least, music is a great contributor to that fabric.  We all have favorite musical selections, whether they be popular music, classical, jazz, opera, etc., that we choose to hear again and again.  In addition to those favorites, there's another category of music that may have an even deeper connection to our memories and our life story.  You might consider this "background music", but I believe that it is very powerful, almost like our sense of smell; it can transport us back to a time and place in the same way.

I'll give you some examples from my own life:

My parents' record collection included two selections that take me back to my childhood.  The first is Till Then by the Mills Brothers.  I will always connect that song to my dad's service during World War II and his being apart from my mother.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYQ2yc9g51c

The second is from a record that I asked my mother to play over and over.  I loved the rhythm and would even (try to) dance to it.  It's Blue Flame by the Woody Herman Orchestra.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3BfSTc0vc8

I am transported back to my childhood breakfast table by gospel songs played on Old Camp Meeting Time, such as On the Wings of a Dove http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLfGCs_sV1A and I'll Fly Away http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wr_3TVucft0&feature=related

When I was a teenager during the 60's, popular music accompanied almost every event.  A few songs take me back to specific friends and events.  When I hear Twist and Shout http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVlr4g5-r18  I am driving my Buick convertible with my friend, Judy, and we're singing along.  If it didn't happen to be playing on the radio, we sang our own version, without accompaniment. (Twist and Shout can also take me to Albuquerque in the 1980's, when my new husband, his children and mine had our own version taped in an amusement park.)  If I should hear Gene Chandler's Duke of Earl http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9PoUsRibtE, I am again in my convertible, singing with my friend Beverly, as we drive the country highways of southeast Missouri.

My mother was hospitalized in Memphis when I was a junior in high school and a couple of songs will always remind me of riding in the car with my dad, on the way to visit my mother.  I remember these songs especially because he mentioned that he liked them and because they spoke of his love for her.  They were Let It Be Me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XWWXJObowsI&feature=related and We'll Sing in the Sunshine http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxZI0Cxaq20

Now I find that, more and more, music reminds me of my children and my grandchildren, often to school and church performances and concerts.  Lean on Me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPoTGyWT0Cg&feature=related   by Bill Withers takes me to the Great Lakes Naval Base when my son graduated from basic training; he was soloist for a select choir performance of the song.

The Lion Sleeps Tonight  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_LBmUwi6mEo will always be connected to Christmas lights in my memory.  Our blended family drove to the city to see the displays shortly after Tom and I married and we entertained ourselves by singing "a wimoweh a wimoweh" over and over.

There are many more examples of the "background music" that have given my own life and memories texture and detail.  I'm sure that you have your own and would love to hear about them.

Love,
Annie