Friday, October 1, 2010

My Suggestion for Oprah's Aging Beauties

I watched Oprah's program on beauty and aging last night and was very interested in what Teri Hatcher, Cybill Shepherd, and Linda Evans had to say.  (Okay, I was also interested in what Cybill and Linda look like now, since they are in their sixties.  But that's another subject.)

The focus was primarily on what happens when really beautiful women age and have to come to grips with their beauty fading.  Not having been beautiful at a young age nor when older, I can't really speak from their experience, but I did have my share of compliments and attention as a reasonably attractive woman and can offer my opinion on the subject.

Of course, there were background photos of these gorgeous women as they were and their own remarks about how they didn't really feel beautiful when they were younger.  I'm not saying that they (Cybill and Linda, specifically) weren't being truthful, but I wonder what they thought about the rest of us, if they didn't see themselves as beautiful.

But that's really not what this post is about.  All three women, plus Oprah, emphasized the importance of finding things to like about ourselves, to develop our inward beauty and grace, and to accept the inevitability of (our culture's concept) of physical beauty going away. 

I agree with them.  I also read somewhere that it's good for women to have beauty when we're young, brains when we're older and money when we're really old.  (I'm not sure that is the exact way it should be quoted.)  I agree with that, also. 

For those of us who don't have great reserves of beauty, brains, or money, I have another suggestion.  I would like to offer it to Teri, Cybill, and Linda.  I think that Oprah would agree that the best thing you can have as a hedge against loss of beauty, love, money, or even when you get so old your brains give out is ----- GIRLFRIENDS!

If you have girlfriends, they probably didn't choose you as a friend because you were beautiful, and they certainly won't care if your beauty fades.  They will be there when your looks go (but will keep telling you that you look great).  They will be there when your man is gone either because he's found another, probably younger woman or because, sadly, men tend to die earlier than women.  They will be there when your money is gone or it's not, because they will remember the fun you had when none of you had any.   They will be there when your brains aren't so sharp anymore -- they'll point you in the right direction and make sure you stay out of trouble.

It may well be that Teri, Cybill, and Linda have girlfriends.  I know that Oprah has Gayle, but I hope she has some other girlfriends, too.  It's my belief that you can't have too many girlfriends.  The subject didn't come up on the "Fading Beauties" show and I wondered why. 

I think that the rest of us, especially those who were never "great beauties" understand the value of our friends.  We wouldn't trade them for anything!



Leanne said...

Great post, Annie. I don't usually watch Oprah, but caught the re-airing of this show late in the evening, and I watched most of it. I have to say, even though I am not a "beautiful" person (as the 3 guests are), I was really interested getting their take on aging. I was also pretty amazed that they each (I believe) allowed themselves to be shown "natural" ... I really enjoyed the show. But I have to say, I agree whole=heartedly with your comment on the importance of friends. My dearest friends make me feel stunning, when I know that I am not (and my blog friends, especially!) Have a great weekend!

Nan said...

This was so very interesting! Maybe because I, too was never 'beautiful' but I simply don't understand why people, sadly especially women, don't just get on with their lives instead of thinking about how they look and spending all their time getting lifts and dyeing hair, blah blah. I saw a picture the other day of Hillary C. with 3 men about her age. They were all gray and she was, well, whatever color her hair is called. I think it diminishes us as a gender to be always trying to look young. No one looks older than someone who is trying to look younger. We still have so far to go. Great, great post.


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